While listening to a lecture called "On the Origins of a Cultural Species" (click to listen) from Emory University's Center for Mind, Brain & Culture, the speaker (Joe Henrich from the University of British Columbia) revealed the secret for fixing picky eating habits.In the lecture, Joe Henrich talked about how kids choose to model their learning and behavior after slightly older, happy, confident-looking kids who are getting positive attention from parents and other important social figures.
If you have a picky eater, he offered some helpful advice based off of scientific research:
"If you want to convince a kid to change [picky eating habits], the best thing you can do is not give him incentives, not teach him about the health quality of the food, but to sit him down at a table with kids slightly older who really like the food. They'll eat the food, he'll see them move it, and then next you'll find that that kid will request that food next time he comes. He'll eat more of it, select it on his own."
This is a critical example of "show don't tell." When you're fixing picky eating habits, don't insist that the kid eat such-and-such--that will only lead to resistance. Instead, let them just observe and make their own choice. Find slightly older kids as models who are (or can act) happy, very confident, and who love eating the food that the picky eater won't eat.
Have the picky eater sit at the table with the model kids and have the models eat the food enthusiastically and maybe even tell them in private ahead of time to exaggerate how much they love the food. Kids are natural hams and having a silly role to play like this will be fun for them.
Don't tell the picky eater, "Notice how Ben and Amy love spinach!" Just let the picky eater make their own observations and decisions. Choices we make on our own give us the most long-lasting change.
